I’m going to Rome. To visit the Pope. To speak Latin. Have a toga party. To drink capuccino, in its natural habitat. To watch the world cup in a place where they have no personal interest. And to go to a wedding. Which is tomorrow. And that’s exciting. Almost as exciting as the fact that Lila is currently at large (or ‘at little’ really) in Rome. She’s learning to speak Italian. Pretty much as she’s learning to speak English. Its all greek to her.

I booked the flights last year. As soon as the ‘save the date’ thingy came round. And got them on air miles. The only outbound flight they had was Business Class, for not very many miles so that’s what we got. Which makes no difference on a short flight. Other than the lounge.

And I’m sitting there with my (English) capuccino, chewing my (English) pain au raison, perusing the paper. And learned something massive. Other than thinking that possibly it might be an idea to do drug tests on the Russian footballers. Just because: a. they’re playing so much better than anyone imagined they could, and b. they’re Russians.

But on the front page I learned the most wonderful thing. That people who ‘drink’ will live longer and suffer less possible cancers than teetotallers. I mean how amazing is that? Trump and all the other smug, alcohol-free-thinkers will be buried by a bunch of hiccuping piss-heads. So I immediately hit the free bar in the lounge and started on the path to a longer life in earnest.

Then, before my vision started doubling I got to the bit where they used the horrible, hateful, most-dullest of all terms, the ultimate ‘m-word’… Moderation! At which point I poured myself another (well, it may have been 7.30am in London but it was 6pm somewhere in the world, right??) large one and pondered how flexible a term ‘moderation’ is when you really start to think about it.

As some clever person once said: I just want one drink, because it makes me feel like a new man. But then he wants a drink too.

More Brits watched England beat Tunisia on Monday than watched the royal wedding. Therefore Harry Kane is more gorgeous than Meghan. Its beyond question.

Aribaderchi

A xxxx