I might be in Australia but I’m a Brit. Therefore am at liberty to discuss the weather at any opportunity. And its an odd thing here. ‘Here’ being wherever I am at the time. Which was the Hunter Valley for the last 2 days and now its Sydney, to where I’ve returned.

We’ve had a lot of rain, good for the grapes I’m sure, not so good for the tourists. But it was mainly at night. And its been cloudy, which is dull but ok. But yesterday we had some sun. Like, real, blue sky, cloudless, Southern Hemisphere summer sun. It was 37 degrees of Celsiusness and felt like 50. So we did what any sensible cold-climateers would and took some bikes out to explore the wineries. There’s no shade. No escape, just this sheer, intense heat. Quite like nothing I’ve experienced before, and I’ve done my share of ‘hot’. Maybe its the lack of Ozone layer, maybe its… just Aussie contrariness, I don’t know. But fuck me it was hot. But we survived it with various rests, just to get out of the heat on what was not a particularly taxing ride.

And we drank wine. Lovely wine. Shitty wine. Who cares? Whatever they put in front of you, you drink. Be rude not to.

Now we’re at Bondi. I like Bondi, its a cool place. Feels warm and muggy, because its in Australia, but its ‘cool’.

Unlike Jeremy Corbyn. Backing another lost fucking cause. Seen here with his ‘mates’ at the Emirates the other night. Enjoying watching the footballing wonders that are the Tottenham Hotspurs as they eliminated his own sad team from the Caribou Cup. Yes I do know what a Caribou is but not in that context.

So Jose’s gone from Old Trafford, no big surprise there. And the talk is not merely that United want Pochettino, but in today’s Times (yes, I get it way before you’re even awake) there talking about what Pochettino ‘will’ do once he ‘is’ at United. Nothing presumptuous there then. So to all Manchester United fans, to all greedy, cash-stripping Glazers, to anyone called Woodward, I have a message for you.

KEEP YOUR FUCKING HANDS AND YOUR HORRIBLY LAUNDERED CASH AWAY FROM OUR MANAGER. HE’S MUCH TOO GOOD FOR YOUR SAD AND SORRY ORGANISATION AND IF YOU MAKE ANY OFFERS I WILL KILL YOU ALL.

I don’t think that’s unreasonable.

Happy hot, sunny, cold, rainy, grey, blue, searingly intense Friday.

A xxxx