I love a World Cup. It’s just the qualifiers that cause me grief. No ‘football’ this week. And by ‘football’ I mean, proper, English, Premiership, top draw stuff. I mean Spurs winning, Arsenal losing, Chelsea all getting sent off, Manchester City making the awesome look mundane. Football.

What I don’t mean by ‘football’ is an otherwise (that World Cup thing) meaningless match against San Marino. But we won 5 nil!!!! I hear you shout. We should have won 15 nil. England has a population of 60 million people. San Marino has 33,000. The same as Bury St Edmonds. Bit less than on Canvey Island. Few more than Coalville. Which I’ve never heard of. None of which are allowed ‘international status’ or World Cup entry. But some poxy town in Italy (its actually lovely; went there about 50 years ago, sweet) was declared by some old geezer in a white frock to be a ‘principality’ and that gives them the right to be the lowest ranked football team in the world.

Next up we play a much stronger side. Albania. A ‘proper country’, albeit one more famous for producing Marble Arch pickpockets than world class wingers. My advice to the team, my tactic talk to Gareth Southgate and the boys would be: make sure your locker is secure.

But never mind. I’m going to have my SECOND vaccination on Wednesday. I received a personal phone call from NHS ENGLAND (not NHS San Marino or NHS Albania) the other day, inviting me, as an ‘essential front line worker’. I was rolling my sleeve up as we spoke to make the appointment. Because the first dose made me feel like I’m invincible, this second, the booster, the ‘last piece of the puzzle’, the ‘way out of this shit’, will simply turn me into A FUCKING GOD!!!!

And tennis starts again tomorrow. We’ve waited so long. Nice of them to arrange it for a Monday, when I generally play on Saturdays and Sundays, but… well, it is what it is. Just gotta try and remember what to do once I get on court.

We’re getting there. I just wish I knew what ‘there’ was and what it looks like.

Happy Sunday

A xxxx